どうも、小野田です。
「友達と会話続かなくて沈黙が気まずい！」
って感じたことありますか？
僕もそう感じてたことあります。
が、今なら声を大にしてこれを伝えたい。
気まずい！は幻想
気まずい！を感じる場面ってたくさんあると思います。
・彼氏（彼女）と沈黙になって気まずい
・デートで会話途切れて気まずい
・美容師さんにカットしてもらってるとき気まずい
・職場で上司と２人になると気まずい
僕もそう感じてました。
沈黙になると、そわそわしてきて
「なにか喋らないと！なに喋ろう？思いつかないー！！」
って、なってました。笑
そして振り絞った最後の１滴の言葉は、
「お腹空いたー」・・・みたいな。苦笑
せっかく好きな人と楽しむためにデートしても、
「なに喋ろう？！」と考え過ぎて疲れちゃってました。
でも、気付いたんです。
気付いちゃったんです。
＝＝＝＝＝＝＝＝＝＝＝＝＝＝
「気まずい」は、
自分が勝手にそう感じてるだけ。
＝＝＝＝＝＝＝＝＝＝＝＝＝＝
ってことに。
衝撃的。
世紀の大発見でした。
「気まずい」は”現象”ではなかったんです。
ただの”主観”なんですよ。
「気まずい」って感じてるから気まずいだけで、
その場が気まずくなったわけじゃない。
これに気付いてから、
「別にこれは気まずい場面じゃない」
と思うようにしました。
そしたら、気まずさを感じることがなくなったんです。
気まずさを感じなくなったら、
ソワソワモゾモゾもしなくなるので、
自然と余裕のある雰囲気になります。
そのおかげか、
「いつも心に余裕あるよね。」
と言われることが多くなりました。
昔はあんなにソワソワしてたのに。笑
でも、そのためにやったことはシンプル！
「気まずい」は、
自分が勝手に感じてるだけなんだ。
と気付くこと。
これだけでした。
こういうのって他にもたくさんあるよなーと思いますけど、
話が脱線するのでその辺はLINE＠で補足するとします。
まだ参加してなかったら参加しておくべし。
ではではー！
いつもありがとうございます。
◆LINE＠も好評です◆
技術ばかりに偏るコミュニケーション教材に疑問を感じ、
心×身体×技術
＝コミュニケーション力
そんな信念から、心と身体を整え
伝え方の技術も磨くために、
脳科学、東洋医学、哲学、心理学など
最高レベルの情報を惜しみなく発信してます。
期間限定で電子書籍シリーズもプレゼント中！
コメント
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Reading this prompted me to dig into a related topic later, and a stop at actionwithstructure provided some of the starting points for that follow up reading, content that triggers further exploration rather than satisfying curiosity completely is content with real generative energy and this site has plenty of that energy throughout it.
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Reading this in segments because the day was busy, and the post survived the fragmented attention well, and a stop at strategycreatesflow held up similarly under interrupted reading, content that can withstand modern distracted reading patterns rather than requiring a perfect block of focused time is increasingly the kind I prefer.
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A thoughtful read in a week that has been mostly noisy, and a look at claritybeforecomplexity carried that thoughtful quality across more pages, finding pockets of considered writing in a week of distractions is one of the small wins of careful curation and this site is providing those pockets at a sustainable rate.
Reading this confirmed that the topic deserves more careful attention than it usually gets, and a stop at progressoveractivity extended that elevated framing, content that raises the appropriate weight of a subject without being preachy about it is serving a quiet but important editorial function for the broader cultural conversation about it.
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Liked everything about the experience, from the opening through to the closing notes, and a stop at signaloverdistraction extended that into more pages, finding a site where the editorial vision shows through every choice rather than feeling random is an increasingly rare experience and one I am glad to have today during this particular reading session.
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Decided not to skim despite my usual habit and was rewarded for the discipline, and a stop at growththroughsimplicity earned the same patient approach, training myself to recognise sites that warrant slower reading is part of being a careful online reader and this site is the kind that helps me practice that skill regularly.
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Now organising my browser bookmarks to give this site easier access, and a look at forwardmomentumlogic earned the same organisational priority, the small acts of digital housekeeping I do for sites I expect to use often are themselves a measure of trust and this site has triggered the trust based housekeeping behaviour from me clearly.
Skipped the TLDR thinking I would read everything anyway, and ended up enjoying the path through the full post, and a stop at actionbuildsconfidence similarly rewarded the patient read, summaries are useful but the journey through good writing is part of what makes the destination feel earned rather than just delivered cleanly.
Felt like I was reading something written by someone who actually thinks about the topic rather than reciting it, and a look at growthflowswithintent reinforced that impression, the difference between recited content and considered content is huge and this site clearly belongs to the latter category which I appreciate as a careful reader looking for substance.
The conclusions felt earned rather than tacked on at the end like an afterthought, and a look at ideasneedclarity kept that careful structure going, you can tell when a writer has thought about the shape of their post versus just letting it ramble out and hoping for the best at the end which most do.
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Worth a quiet moment of recognition for the consistency I have noticed across multiple posts, and a stop at ideasbecomemovement continued that consistent quality, sites that maintain quality across many pieces rather than peaking on one viral post are sites with real editorial discipline and this one has clearly developed that discipline carefully.
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