どうも、小野田です。
「友達と会話続かなくて沈黙が気まずい！」
って感じたことありますか？
僕もそう感じてたことあります。
が、今なら声を大にしてこれを伝えたい。
気まずい！は幻想
気まずい！を感じる場面ってたくさんあると思います。
・彼氏（彼女）と沈黙になって気まずい
・デートで会話途切れて気まずい
・美容師さんにカットしてもらってるとき気まずい
・職場で上司と２人になると気まずい
僕もそう感じてました。
沈黙になると、そわそわしてきて
「なにか喋らないと！なに喋ろう？思いつかないー！！」
って、なってました。笑
そして振り絞った最後の１滴の言葉は、
「お腹空いたー」・・・みたいな。苦笑
せっかく好きな人と楽しむためにデートしても、
「なに喋ろう？！」と考え過ぎて疲れちゃってました。
でも、気付いたんです。
気付いちゃったんです。
＝＝＝＝＝＝＝＝＝＝＝＝＝＝
「気まずい」は、
自分が勝手にそう感じてるだけ。
＝＝＝＝＝＝＝＝＝＝＝＝＝＝
ってことに。
衝撃的。
世紀の大発見でした。
「気まずい」は”現象”ではなかったんです。
ただの”主観”なんですよ。
「気まずい」って感じてるから気まずいだけで、
その場が気まずくなったわけじゃない。
これに気付いてから、
「別にこれは気まずい場面じゃない」
と思うようにしました。
そしたら、気まずさを感じることがなくなったんです。
気まずさを感じなくなったら、
ソワソワモゾモゾもしなくなるので、
自然と余裕のある雰囲気になります。
そのおかげか、
「いつも心に余裕あるよね。」
と言われることが多くなりました。
昔はあんなにソワソワしてたのに。笑
でも、そのためにやったことはシンプル！
「気まずい」は、
自分が勝手に感じてるだけなんだ。
と気付くこと。
これだけでした。
こういうのって他にもたくさんあるよなーと思いますけど、
話が脱線するのでその辺はLINE＠で補足するとします。
まだ参加してなかったら参加しておくべし。
ではではー！
いつもありがとうございます。
◆LINE＠も好評です◆
技術ばかりに偏るコミュニケーション教材に疑問を感じ、
心×身体×技術
＝コミュニケーション力
そんな信念から、心と身体を整え
伝え方の技術も磨くために、
脳科学、東洋医学、哲学、心理学など
最高レベルの情報を惜しみなく発信してます。
期間限定で電子書籍シリーズもプレゼント中！
コメント
Quietly enthusiastic about this site after the past few hours of reading, and a stop at growthtrajectory extended that enthusiasm, the calibration of enthusiasm to evidence is something I try to maintain and this site has earned a calibrated quiet enthusiasm rather than the loud excitement that usually fades within a day or two of finding something.
Glad the writer did not feel compelled to cover every possible angle of the topic, focus is a virtue, and a stop at actiondrive reflected the same disciplined scope, knowing what to leave out is half of what makes good writing good and this post has clearly been edited with that principle in mind.
A quiet kind of confidence runs through the writing, and a look at claritydrivenmoves carried that same understated assurance, confidence without bragging is the most attractive register for online writing and the writers here have clearly developed it through practice rather than affecting it through stylistic tricks that would feel hollow eventually.
Quiet confidence runs through the whole post, no need to shout to make the points stick, and a stop at clarityfirstaction carried that same restrained voice forward, content that respects the reader by trusting its own substance rather than dressing it up in theatrical language is what I look for online and rarely actually find these days.
Felt like the post had been edited rather than just drafted and published, and a stop at actioncreatesdirection suggested the same care across the site, the difference between edited and unedited content is enormous for the reader and this site has clearly invested in the editing pass that most blogs skip entirely which really does show up.
A welcome contrast to the loud takes that have dominated my feed lately, and a look at ideasneedexecutionnow extended that calm voice, content that arrives without yelling has become unusual in the modern attention economy and this site is one of the few places I have found that consistently delivers without raising its voice.
After reading several posts back to back the consistent voice across them is impressive, and a stop at growthinmotion continued that voice consistency, sites that maintain a single coherent voice across many pieces by potentially many writers represent serious editorial discipline and this one has clearly developed the institutional consistency needed for that.
Coming back to this one, definitely, and a quick visit to signalshapessuccess only made me more sure of that, the kind of writing that makes you want to set aside time later rather than rushing through it now while distracted by everything else competing for attention on the screen today across so many tabs.
Thanks for taking the time to write this, it is clear that some thought went into how each point would land, and after I went through buildtractionnow I had a better grip on the topic, real value without the usual marketing noise people have to put up with online when searching for answers.
More original than the recycled takes I keep finding on the topic elsewhere, and a quick look at actioncreatespace confirmed it, the kind of site that has its own voice rather than echoing whatever is trending which makes it stand out as a refreshing change from the usual rotation of generic content I see daily.
Just want to record that this site is entering my regular reading list, and a look at clarityturnskeys confirmed it deserves the spot, my regular reading list is short and well curated and adding to it requires meeting a fairly high quality bar that this site has clearly cleared without much effort apparently.
Found this really helpful, the explanations are simple but they actually answer the questions a normal reader would have, and after I followed actionoverhesitation I had a clearer sense of the topic, no extra fluff just useful points laid out in a sensible order that made the time worth it.
Will be passing this along to a few people who would benefit from the perspective shared here, and a stop at focusbeatsfriction only added to what I will be sharing, this kind of generous content deserves to circulate widely rather than getting buried in some search engine algorithm tweak that pushes it down the rankings.
Once I trust a site this much I tend to read everything they publish and that is the trajectory I am on with this one, and a stop at clarityroute confirmed the trajectory, the rare progression from interested reader to comprehensive reader is something only certain sites earn and this one is earning that progression rapidly.
A piece that brought a sense of order to a topic I had been finding chaotic, and a look at ideasneedpath continued that organising effect, content that imposes useful structure on messy subjects is doing genuine intellectual work and this site is providing that organisational function across multiple posts I have read recently here.
Useful reading material, the kind I can hand off to someone newer to the topic without worrying about confusing them, and a quick look at actionleadsforward confirmed the same beginner friendly tone runs throughout the site which is great for sharing with people just starting their learning journey on this particular topic.
Closed three other tabs to focus on this one and never opened them again, and a stop at actioncycle similarly held attention exclusively, content that crowds out other reading from working memory is content with real density and this site has demonstrated that density across multiple pages I have visited so far this morning.
Got something practical out of this that I can apply later this week, and a stop at ideasunlockmovement added more details to think about, this is exactly the kind of content I bookmark for future reference rather than the throwaway listicles that dominate most search results these days for almost any common topic.
Now appreciating that I did not feel exhausted after reading, and a stop at actionwithsignal extended that energising quality, content that leaves me with more attention than it consumed is rare and the gap between draining and energising content is real over the course of a typical day spent reading widely online.
Now I want to find more sites like this but I suspect they are rare, and a look at signalcreatesclarity extended that thought, the few sites that meet this quality bar are precious specifically because they are rare and finding others like them is one of the ongoing projects of careful internet curation across the years.
Thanks for the clean writing, no broken sentences and no awkward translations like some other sites have, and a quick stop at forwardenergyhub kept that polish going nicely, it really does make a difference when a reader can move through a page without tripping on every line or going back to reread.
Glad the writer kept this short rather than padding it out, the points stand on their own without needing extra context, and a look at progresswithdirectionalforce kept the same approach going, brevity is a sign of confidence in the substance and the team here clearly trusts their content to land without filler.
Found the writing surprisingly fresh for what is by now a well covered topic, and a stop at progresswithsignal kept that freshness going across the related pages, original perspective on familiar ground is hard to come by and this site has clearly earned its place in the conversation rather than just rehashing old ideas.
Will be sharing this with a couple of people who care about the topic, and a stop at motioncreatesresults added more material worth passing along, the kind of site that is generous with quality content and does not make you jump through hoops to access it which is appreciated more than the team probably realises.
I came here looking for a quick answer and ended up reading the whole post because it was actually interesting, and after actionignitesgrowth I had a much fuller picture, no stress and no confusion just a clear walk through the topic that made everything fall into place without much effort.
Bookmark folder created specifically for this site, and a look at actionunlocksclarity confirmed the dedicated folder was the right call, dedicated folders for individual sites are a level of organisation I rarely deploy and this site has earned that level of dedicated tracking based on the consistency I have seen so far across sessions.
Felt a small spark of recognition when the post named something I had been struggling to articulate, and a look at directionsetsspeed produced more such moments, the rare service of giving readers language for fuzzy intuitions is one of the higher values that good writing can provide and this site offered several today instances.
During a quiet evening reading session this provided just the right depth without being heavy, and a stop at growthwithforwardmotion maintained the same evening appropriate weight, content with depth that does not exhaust the reader is content with editorial calibration and this site has clearly figured out how to be substantial without being demanding all the time.
Recommend this to anyone who values clear thinking over flashy presentation, and a stop at progressunlocked continued in the same understated way, this site has its priorities in the right place which makes it worth supporting through repeat visits and recommendations rather than just one passing read today before moving on quickly elsewhere.
Reading this gave me a small sense of progress on a topic I have been slowly working through, and a stop at buildmomentumclean added another step forward, learning happens in small increments across many sources and finding sources that consistently contribute is the actual practical value of careful curation in an information rich world.
Skipped breakfast still reading this and finished hungry but satisfied, and a stop at momentumbychoice kept me past breakfast time, content that displaces basic biological needs is content with serious attentional pull and the writers here are clearly capable of producing that level of engagement which is genuinely impressive these days.
Worth pointing out that the post avoided the temptation to summarise everything at the end, and a look at intentionalprogresspath continued that confident closing approach, content that trusts readers to retain the substance without being reminded of it at the end is content that respects the reader and this site practices that respect.
Honestly impressed by the consistency of voice across what I have read so far, and a quick visit to clarityguidesexecution continued that consistent feel, when a site reads like one careful person rather than a committee the experience is more rewarding for the reader who notices these subtle editorial details over time.
Liked that there was nothing performative about the writing, and a stop at signaldrivenmomentum continued that genuine quality, performative writing tries to be witnessed rather than read and the difference between performance and substance is huge for the careful reader and this site has clearly chosen substance every time clearly.
Looking back on this reading session it stands as one of the better ones recently, and a look at claritydrivesvelocity extended that ranking, the informal ranking of reading sessions against each other is something I do mentally and this session ranks high largely because of this site and a couple of related pages here.
Thank you for not assuming the reader already knows everything, the explanations meet me where I am, and a look at growthfollowsfocus did the same, that consideration is what makes a site feel welcoming rather than gatekeepy which is sadly the default mood across the modern web today for most subjects covered.
Worth recognising the absence of the usual blog tropes here, and a look at directionisleverage continued that fresh quality, sites that avoid the standard moves of the medium read as more original even when the content is on familiar topics and this one has clearly chosen its own path through the conventional terrain skilfully.
Started reading expecting to disagree and ended mostly nodding along, and a look at growthchannel continued the pattern, content that wins agreement through evidence and reasoning rather than rhetorical force is the kind that actually shifts minds and this site clearly knows how to do that across what I have read so far.
Reading this gave me a small framework I expect to use going forward, and a stop at forwardlogiclab extended that framework, content that produces transferable mental models rather than just specific facts is content with multiplicative value and this site is providing those models at a rate that justifies extra attention from me regularly.
Quality writing that respects the reader’s intelligence without overloading them, and a quick look at buildsmartmotion reflected that approach, a balanced thoughtful site that earns trust by being consistent rather than by shouting about how trustworthy it is which is the usual approach online sadly across most content categories.
Solid recommendation from me to anyone working in the area, the perspective here is grounded, and a look at clarityshapesspeed adds even more useful angles, the kind of site that becomes a reference rather than just a one time read which is a higher bar than most blogs ever reach today on the modern web.
Came away with a small but real shift in perspective on the topic, and a stop at motionwithclarity pushed that shift a bit further, the kind of subtle reframing that good writing does to a reader without making a big deal of it is something I always appreciate when it happens which is sadly not that often.
A clean piece that knew exactly what it wanted to say and said it, and a look at signaldrivenaction maintained the same clarity of intention, knowing the goal of a piece before writing is something most blog content lacks and the clarity of purpose here shows up in every paragraph for any careful reader to notice.
Felt the writer respected the topic without being precious about it, and a look at buildtractioncleanly continued that respectful but unfussy treatment, finding the right register for serious topics is hard and this site has clearly figured out how to take the topic seriously while still being readable for casual visitors regularly.
Worth saying that the prose reads naturally without straining for style, and a stop at ideasbecomeaction maintained the same unforced quality, writing that achieves elegance without effort is the highest tier and this site has clearly worked out how to land that effortless quality consistently rather than only on the writers best days.
Really thankful for posts that respect a reader’s time, this one does, and a quick look at claritycreatesadvantage was the same, no need to scroll through endless intros just to get to the actual content, that approach alone is enough reason to come back here regularly for the kind of writing offered.
Now setting aside time on my next free afternoon to read more from the archives, and a stop at claritybeforevelocity confirmed that time will be well spent, the rare site whose archive deserves a dedicated reading session rather than just casual sampling is the kind of resource worth scheduling around and this one qualifies clearly.
Now feeling slightly more optimistic about the state of independent writing online, and a stop at ideasintosystems extended that quiet optimism, sites like this one are the reason I have not given up on the open web entirely and finding them occasionally renews the case for paying attention to non algorithmic content sources today.
Felt like the post had been edited rather than just drafted and published, and a stop at actiondrivenshift suggested the same care across the site, the difference between edited and unedited content is enormous for the reader and this site has clearly invested in the editing pass that most blogs skip entirely which really does show up.
Just want to record that this site is entering my regular reading list, and a look at motionbeatsmotionless confirmed it deserves the spot, my regular reading list is short and well curated and adding to it requires meeting a fairly high quality bar that this site has clearly cleared without much effort apparently.