笑顔の効果で出会いを引き寄せる?

恋愛・コミュニケーション

どうも、小野田です。

「笑顔には素晴らしい効果があるから、
なるべく笑顔でいよう」

というのは、聞き飽きるくらい言われています。

(※この効果を体感してもらうため、
合間に僕がTwitterで「#1日1ボケて」
でツイートしているボケて画像を貼っていきます。笑)

僕もこれを否定するつもりはなくて、
なにより僕自身が「よく笑おう」と
意識するようになってから明らかに人格変わってきました。
 

とはいえ、
「愛想笑いしよう!」を勧めてるわけじゃないし、
「いい人間関係には無愛想さが大事だよ!」
という考えも変わっていません。

無愛想はあくまでも、
「力まずに自然体でいい」
という意味なので、笑顔をなくすって意味ではありません。

目の前のことに対して
「楽しもう」というスタンスになり、
自然体で笑顔になることが増えるなら、
それはそれで素晴らしいこと。

ですので、笑顔の効果と、
人間関係でどう役立つのかを見ていきます。
 

笑顔の効果とは?

人は、自分を笑顔にしてくれた人には
無条件で好意を抱きます。

(愛想笑いじゃないもの)

面白い人がモテるというのは、
この影響が大きいです。

なので、好きな人とデートするときに大事なのは、
面白い話をして笑わせる、
って方法じゃなくてもいいから、
とにかく相手が笑顔でいる時間を増やすような意識。

というのが重要だったり。
 

初対面の人に良い印象を持ってもらいたい時も同じく。

僕は話すのが得意ではないので、
まずは自分が楽しんで笑顔になり、
それで相手にも笑顔になってもらう、
というのを意識してました。

そう・・・
 

笑顔は伝染する

笑顔の人が近くにいると、
自分も笑顔になるんですよね。

学生時代、飲み屋でアルバイトしていた頃、
アメリカ人っぽい人がお客さんで来たときがありました。

そのとき、とにかく陽気に笑ってるんです。笑

小さなお店だったので、
お店全体に聞こえるように
「HAHAHAHAっ!」と笑ってました。

それを見てたら、
働いてるスタッフもその場にいるお客さんも、
自然とみんな笑顔になってました。

笑顔は伝染するんです。
 

さらに、こんな研究データもあります。
 

科学的なデータや引用

◆笑顔には健康促進効果があり、
寿命を延ばすと言われています。

◆スウェーデンのウプサラ大学の研究では、
「笑顔の人を見ながらしかめっ面をするのは困難」という研究データ。

◆『進化論』で有名なダーウィンは、
表情フィードバック理論として
「楽しいことがあったから笑顔になるだけじゃなくて、
笑顔になれば気持ちが楽しくなるという方向もある」
と主張。

◆アランの『幸福論(77章友情)』より↓

”赤ん坊がはじめて笑うとき、
その笑いはなにかを表現しているわけではない。
幸せだから笑うのではない。
私に言わせてみれば反対で、
笑っているから幸せなのだ。
食べて楽しむのと同じように、
笑って楽しんでいるのである。”

◆(『TED TALKS』日経BP社)より

”笑ってくれる観客は、すぐにあなたを好きになる 。
あなたを好きになってくれたら、
あなたの言葉にも真剣に耳を傾けるようになる。
笑いは相手の守りをほどき、
あなたは彼らと本当に通じ合うチャンスを得る。”

最後に

「笑顔でいよう」と考えると、
策略的な感じがして嫌だな〜と感じる部分もあると思います。

ですが、こう考えてみたらどうでしょう?
 

笑顔は、プレゼント
 

少なくとも、
自分と一緒にいる相手が笑顔でいるのは
嫌なことではないと思います。

むしろ、嬉しいことのはず。
自分の存在意義を感じれる瞬間のはず。

だからこそ、相手の前で笑顔でいるのは、
プレゼントなんです。
 

いつも笑顔で楽しそうな人の所に
人が集まるのは、プレゼントを配ってるから。

そういう人には、
出会いも引き寄せられます。

ただ、無理して笑いましょうとは言いません。

あなたの常温(無愛想さ)も魅力なので。

ですが、1日1回でも笑顔でいる瞬間を増やすのは、
周囲の人にプレゼントすることなんだ、
というのは覚えておいてもらえればなと思います。

ではではー!
 

◆LINE@も好評です◆

技術ばかりに偏るコミュニケーション教材に疑問を感じ、
心×身体×技術
=コミュニケーション力

そんな信念から、心と身体を整え
伝え方の技術も磨くために、
脳科学、東洋医学、哲学、心理学など
最高レベルの情報を惜しみなく発信してます。

直接LINEでのやり取りもできます。
(400人以上が参加)

(もしくはLINE ID「@carory」で@込みで検索)

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